Surviving or Thriving?

Let’s be honest, January isn’t a competition—and most of us are just doing our best to get through. With everyone shouting about “new year, new you” and toxic positivity all over the socials, it’s easy to wonder if you’re falling behind. But here’s the truth: whether you’re surviving or thriving (or a bit of both), you’re doing better than you think.

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Survival Mode: The Honest Truth

We’ve all been there. You’re ticking boxes, showing up, and maybe your biggest win is putting on a proper pair of trousers. There’s nothing wrong with survival mode, especially after the chaos of December. Sometimes, just getting through the day is a result in itself. If your energy’s low, your to-do list is long, and your main achievement is keeping the houseplants (and yourself) watered, you’re not failing—you’re human.

Let’s be honest, some days the most ambitious thing you’ll do is get out of bed and pick a slightly less crumpled jumper from 'the chair'. That’s not just okay, it’s necessary. Survival mode is your mind and body’s way of saying “let’s keep things ticking over until the fog lifts.”

Just remember, if you’re doubting yourself, you’re in good company—most of us are quietly wondering if we’re getting it right.

Thriving: It’s Not What Instagram Says

Thriving isn’t about ticking off every goal, smashing your PB at the gym, or having a colour-coded planner strategically laid out on your business class flight.. Sometimes it’s about feeling a bit more like yourself, having a laugh, or getting genuinely excited about something (even if it’s just a new shampoo or a decent night’s sleep). Thriving can be tiny—an idea, a spark, a moment of pride.

Maybe thriving, for you, is saying “no” to something that drains you, or carving out ten minutes for a cuppa in peace. Maybe it’s finally booking that appointment you’ve been putting off, or getting a compliment on your hair and actually believing it. It’s not about being relentlessly positive—it’s about letting yourself notice the good bits, however small.

How to Tell the Difference

Surviving: You’re doing the basics, maybe feeling a bit flat, but you’re still here.

Thriving: You’ve got little glimmers of joy, energy, or inspiration—even if they’re fleeting.

Most of us are a mix, and that’s perfectly fine. Life isn’t a competition, especially not in January. It’s normal to shift between both, sometimes in the same day.

Moving the mind from Surviving to Thriving (When You’re Ready)

Spot the small wins: Got out of bed, made a brew, sent that tricky email? That’s a win.

Give yourself permission to pause: Rest isn’t lazy—it’s fuel.

Find one thing that feels good: A walk, a call with a mate, a new hair mask—whatever lifts you.

1. Micro-goals & Micro-celebrations

Break big tasks into the tiniest possible steps (think: “reply to one email,” “open the window for five minutes”). Celebrate each one - literally say “well done me!” out loud. This rewires your brain to notice progress and builds momentum.

2. Shift Your Environment

A small change—like moving your workspace, changing your playlist, or even putting on a “real” outfit—can reset your mood and energy. Physical shifts often spark mental ones.

3. “Name It to Tame It”

When you feel stuck, say (or write) what you’re feeling: “I’m overwhelmed,” “I’m tired,” “I’m anxious.” Labelling emotions actually reduces their grip, according to neuroscience research.

4. Connect on Your Own Terms

Even a quick text to a friend, a smile at a neighbour, or a chat with your barista can break the isolation loop. Social connection—even tiny, low-pressure ones—are proven to lift mood.

5. Do Something New (No Matter How Small)

Novelty boosts dopamine. Try a new recipe, listen to a new podcast, or walk a different route. It doesn’t have to be life-changing—just something you haven’t done in a while.

6. Move Your Body—Gently

You don’t need to run a marathon. A ten-minute walk, a stretch, or a silly dance in your kitchen is enough to shift your state. Movement is proven to help mental health and spark creativity.

7. Practice “Self-Compassion Breaks”

When you catch yourself in self-doubt, pause and say: “This is tough right now. Others feel this way too. I’m doing my best.” (This is a real, evidence-based technique from self-compassion research.)

8. Limit Doomscrolling & Comparison

Set a timer for social media, or take a mini digital detox—even for an hour. Comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel is a surefire way to stay stuck.

9. Create a “Joy List”

Write down 10 tiny things that make you smile—then pick one and do it. It could be as simple as your favourite song, a hot bath, or making a ridiculously fancy hot chocolate with marshmallows and a flake.

10. Remember: Progress Isn’t Linear

Some days you’ll feel like you’re thriving, others you’ll feel back at square one. That’s normal. The trick is to notice when things feel even a tiny bit better—and build from there. Keep checking in with yourself: Take a minute to ask, “what do I need today?” Sometimes it’s action, sometimes it’s a nap , and always elebrate the progress: Even if it’s tiny.

Actually, especially if it’s tiny.

Remember: thriving looks different for everyone. Your version is enough.

So, are you surviving or thriving right now?

If you’re honest, it’s probably a bit of both—and that’s not just normal, it’s human. January isn’t a race, and nobody’s handing out medals for pretending it’s easy. Some days it’s about getting through, others it’s about finding a spark. Both are worthy, and both are enough.

If you’re in survival mode, be gentle with yourself. If you’re having a thriving moment, celebrate it—and maybe share it with someone who needs a boost. Most importantly, remember: behind every “together” exterior, there’s someone else muddling through just like you.

So, pop the kettle on, put your feet up, and give yourself some credit. You’re doing better than you think, love. And if you fancy sharing what “thriving” looks like for you—or want to cheer someone else on—drop a comment below. Let’s remind each other: surviving is strength, and thriving is possible, even in the middle of a Yorkshire winter.